Meet Neena Buxani, Visual Artist Living Her Best Life

Everyone! Meet Neena Buxani, creator of vibrant, bold, beautiful art. She has had a nontraditional journey to becoming a professional, full time artist, and her love for this moment in her life shines through in her interview. Neena is definitely living her best life, and she has graciously shared her passion with us all. Hell. Yes! 

Tell me about yourself and what you do:

I am a visual artist. I attempt to create paintings that uplift the soul.  My artwork is an expression of a world I want to live in, where joy is a part of every moment. My portfolio is a combination of work that I create to satisfy my need for self-expression in addition to paintings created specifically for people’s homes and offices, interweaving their vision with mine.

What motivates you to do what you do?

It has been a lifelong dream of mine to be a professional artist, and I am truly lucky to have the opportunity to do just that.  My art’s purpose is to remind people to enjoy life and to be themselves. Life is too short to deny ourselves what makes us happy. In my experience, we are happiest when we are our true selves.

Tell me about a moment when you felt empowered:

I go through many moments when I don’t think I’m good enough, or when I feel like I might not be able to pull off a painting for a client. But when I hear the words, “Do what you feel is best, I trust you, you’re the artist”, then all of a sudden I feel like I can create anything. To me, when people believe in my craft, that’s empowering.

How do you get through periods of self-doubt?

I paint. I call my sister or my husband. I cry it out, and then I paint. Putting your artwork out there, whether it be at a show or on social media, is a scary thing to do. You’re essentially putting a piece of yourself on open display.  It’s easy to get caught up in people’s responses to your work and to compare yourself with the successes of other artists. Unfortunately, rejection is a part of everyday life for an artist. You need to stay focused on your goals and create, create, create. You can’t stop creating because you don’t feel good enough, because then you’ll never create. And isn’t it the whole point to do just that.

Who are the people that you look to for inspiration? What makes them stand out to you?

Strong women, like artists Ashley Longshore and Frida Kahlo, who are comfortable in their own skin. The women who don’t give a damn what anyone else thinks. The women who wear what they want and say what they think and who are forever growing in their own way. The women who make the people around them comfortable to be themselves too.

What do you want other women to know about self-acceptance and self-celebration?

It’s important to live an authentic life. Confidence is beautiful, and we should always celebrate who we are because we are all unique in our own way. We all have something special about us that we bring to the world. We all have the power to change people’s lives for the better if we are just strong enough to be ourselves.

Neena’s enthusiasm for creating is inspiring, and I’m so glad that I got to interview her! There were many great takeaways from this interview. It’s hard to pick one! Mine might be her idea to push through the moments of self-doubt and continue with your work. That is a REALLY tough thing to do, and it’s a great way to prove the negative self-chatter wrong. Uch, so good! Check out her work here. (I’m partial to her floral series, but far be it from me to limit your perusing! :))  

-  Lauren, HHT

An Ode to Not Knowing It All

Everyday, I have clients who come into my office, and they are UPSET. They throw their arms into the air and cry, "I don't know it all. I don't have it all figured out. Everyone else knows what they are doing, and I don't. This makes me feel crappy, and I hate it." I imagine that you might feel that way too. 

I have news for you: NONE OF US HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT!

Everyone has their issues (E V E R Y O N E), and none of us know what the heck we are doing all of the time. It's true that some of us are better at faking it than others. It is also true that some people are more plan-oriented than others. However, you are not a bad person if you haven't figured out which life path you want to take, what life goals you want to achieve, and when exactly you want to accomplish them. This is a highly perpetuated myth that social pressures (see also: social media) and our anxious/perfectionist brains have brought upon us, and it's bullshit.  

In fact, I hear these exasperated feelings from so many people, so often that I wrote an ode to not-knowing-it-all. I figure that this concept could use a spotlight in order to fight this shame-inducing hell spiral. 

An Ode to Not Knowing It All

We feel like we must know it all
We must have our lives planned from birth
If we don't, we've dropped the ball
Our selves no longer having worth
People will know
We're frauds, fakes, and fiends
Everyone will run away, leaving us alone
We will toil through life with nothing to show
Never having reached our dreams
Our life never really being our own

Believing everyone else has it figured out
Our friends, family, and neighbors constantly thriving
They have everything, you scream and shout
They always know for what they are striving
Their social media is full of joy
Their lives are so easy
They never question their options or choices
Their lack of a plan will never annoy
They will never know what it is to wake up feeling queasy
Their constant response to life is to say YES with their voices

Take heart, one and all
None of us really know what we are doing
We're all meandering down the life path feeling finite and small
Our fingers are crossed and our feet constantly moving
We're hoping to minimize our pain and strife
All the while recognizing that we know very little
And we can control even less
Take solace in knowing that you are making the best decisions for your life
Instead of feeling like you must know it all now, your path consistently whittled
Celebrate not knowing by inhaling a deep breath and giving yourself some peace from the must-know-it-all stress
Remember that you are doing what you can
You are evolving at your own pace through YOUR lifespan

If you want help breathing deeply as you grow at your own pace, check out my offerings for individual therapy by clicking here. 

- Lauren, HHT

An Interview with Jennifer Aldoretta, CEO of Groove and all around Bad Ass

Everyone, meet Jennifer Aldoretta. She is a fucking powerhouse who is empowering women around their reproductive health. Holy shit! That is a cause that I can get behind. I am so very glad that Jennifer exists and that she has chosen to do this work.

Tell me about yourself and what you do:

Put simply: I’m a women’s health nerd. In 2013, after more than a decade of being on the pill and struggling with painful periods, I started my company, Groove, because I wanted to help educate others about reproductive and menstrual health. That education takes many forms, including our period tracking app, online courses, Humans with Periods project, and humanitarian initiatives. I’m passionate about helping people feel empowered by their bodies and breaking down destructive period taboos that affect people across the globe. I spend an embarrassing amount of time reading medical journals, I love riding my bicycle, and I enjoy lounging around the house with my pup, Bailey.

What motivates you to do what you do?

My mom has been sick on and off for most of my life, and, when I was in high school, one of my sisters was diagnosed with a life-threatening disease that she still battles today. On top of that, I’ve struggled for most of my life with excruciatingly painful periods. So at a very young age, I became aware of how fragile and precious life is, and how quickly health problems can overrun your life. As I’ve gotten older, those experiences have helped me realize that I’m not willing to wait around hoping that someone else will make the changes that I want to see in the world — if everyone waited for someone else to take that leap, nothing would ever change. Steve Jobs once said in an interview, “Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it.” It’s true. I have something unique and wonderful to offer the world, and so does everyone else.

Tell me about a moment when you felt truly awesome:

The moment that comes to mind is probably the first time one of Groove’s app users emailed us and told us that she was pregnant. She and her partner had been trying for quite some time with no success, and then this app that I helped create gave her the education she needed to finally conceive. She was so grateful, and it was the best feeling in the world. That was probably the moment that I felt truly confident in my decision to dedicate my life to helping people understand and feel empowered by their bodies.

How do you get through periods of self-doubt?

When I start to doubt myself, either in my work or in my life, I try to take a step back and think about what my goals are. I try to remember that my life and my goals are so much bigger than a few moments, days, or even weeks of doubt. Recently, I’ve adopted the mantra “Focus less on what you fear and more on what you want.” I repeat it to myself whenever I’m feeling down about something, and it works. It helps me reframe my thinking and focus more on my goals than on my negative feelings in that moment. 

What do you want other women to know about self-acceptance and self-celebration?

Self-acceptance isn’t always something that comes easily — especially in a society that tells you it’s conceited to celebrate yourself. It requires a lot of diligent, consistent work. Everyone has moments of self-doubt, but it’s what you do in those moments and how you treat yourself in those moments that make all the difference in the world. The great thing about self-acceptance is that it has a snowball effect. Even something as simple as repeating a mantra can change the way you feel about yourself.

I am struck by the fact that Jennifer took something painful in her life and turned it into her life’s work. That requires some serious self-empowerment, which we assume is an inborn trait that either you have or don’t. Not true! Jennifer’s interview reminds us that empowerment and self-acceptance are skills that we can practice. The more we use them, the better we are at them! If you want to learn more about Jennifer’s work at Groove, check it out here. You can also meet her and the other women who have been interviewed for Humans with Periods, like yours truly, at a happy hour this Sunday. Click here for details!

If you want to work on flexing your empowerment muscles, check out my individual therapy or therapy boot camp offerings!